The Eagle (2011)

Channing Tatum, Mark Strong, and Jamie Bell

We know what you are probably thinking: Finally these guys review a movie that is new enough that I can actually it find at a Redbox! Yep, we finally made it into the current year with The Eagle. It was originally rated PG-13 for battle sequences and disturbing images (dead bodies and gross wounds). The version we watched was unrated and we can only speculated that the "realistic" blood splatters as well as some of the more gruesome action we saw in the battle scenes were removed keep it from being rated R.

Dan -

I didn't know what to expect with this movie as we started it. I will say that I was very optimistic because the director, Kevin MacDonald, has made some pretty good movies like State of Play, The Last King of Scotland, and Touching the Void. This guy knows how to choose a compelling story and tells it well. Until this movie. It stars Channing Tatum as Marcus, a Roman soldier recently given his first command and on a personal quest to restore his family's honor. Apparently his father was commander of the mysterious Ninth Legion of Rome who marched into unknown and unconquered territory and were never heard from again. Oh, and he lost the prized symbol of the legion: an eagle made of gold (hence the title of the movie). It also stars Jamie Bell as Marcus' slave Esca, who comes from the geographical region that Rome is trying to conquer and where Marcus' father was lost. The two of them embark on the dangerous journey across enemy lines to retrieve the eagle, thereby hoping to restore honor to Marcus' disgraced family name.

There are a whole bunch of movies about either restoring family honor or keeping it in tact, and I honestly have a somewhat difficult time relating to that. My education and background teach about being an individual and doing things to make a name for yourself.  One man's actions are his own and he is not judged or held responsible for anyone else who has gone before him.  Not that there is any problem with these movies for being like that, I just don't relate. I think the closest I come to that is making the people I care about most proud of me, but how much does it matter when the person you are trying to make proud is dead? I don't know, maybe that's the same thing only said in a different way.

There were several parts of this movie that just didn't feel right to me. For starters Marcus just looks too contemporary for this movie, and doesn't quite have the skill to pull off a period piece outside of the 1900s. I don't know if it's a lack of maturity as well as a lack of ability, but I couldn't buy him as a Roman soldier. And the last couple of lines of dialogue also seemed a little modern and did not fit with the rest of the movie. At the end I just felt indifferent. To quote The Simpsons on how I would describe this movie: Meh. There has to be characters that one can actually care about, and while this movie tried to do that they ultimately failed.

Does it deliver anything close to the bar set by other Roman period pieces like Ben-Hur or Gladiator? No, but how could it? There is nowhere near the caliber of talent or story here to work with. The coolest scene is the battle at the beginning, and unfortunately the movie is just downhill from there.

I give this movie 2 out of 5 stars. I was mildly interested throughout, but it wasn't compelling enough in the end.
Mark -

A word of advice to any director or producer thinking of making another film about the Roman Empire...DON’T!!! As much as I, or anyone else, would like to view any film for its own story and standards, it simply isn’t going to happen. Any film based on the Roman Empire is going to be compared to the likes of Gladiator, Ben Hur, and Spartacus, and I don’t really think many people would want to have their film competing with such.

This film had doom written all over it well before Dan and I started to turn into Mystery Science Theater 3000 making smart-ass comments during the supposed serious and intense moments of this film. Predictability is one thing, but taking things to the level of ridiculousness and stupidity is another.

Channing Tatum and Jamie Bell were fine in their respective roles, but it is hard to believe that given the discovered truths and backgrounds of their characters that they would actually want anything to do with the other. Unfortunately, regardless of who was cast in any role for this film, their name or acting would not be able to save this film from its horrid demise.

Obviously I was not a fan of this film, and am grateful for Dan’s sake that it was a film from his netflix queue, and not something that he actually purchased. If you like slow, predictable, plot-hole ridden films, then this a film you will love. Otherwise, just wait til they show it on tv sometime and after 10 minutes you will probably give up on it; as you should. 1½ out of 5 *’s.

My Random Thought For The Eagle: Of all of the things that could have bothered me during this movie, there was one thing that stood out to me in particular. During the final battle between the Romans and the Seal Tribe, the Romans are equipped with swords, while the Seals have hatchets and similar weapons that appear to be made out of sticks and stones. What I still can’t figure out is why does a collision of these two weapons always create a very distinct metal on metal sound?